Words

The phone call jarred me out of my peace.  As I answered the phone and listened to the voice on the other end, stone upon stone was hurled upon my heart.  "You are a failure!"  "You will never be good enough."  The taunts continued.  How I wanted to take the phone and in anger thrust it back upon the receiver.

Words.  Words flowing like a flood.  A torrent of emotion overflowing the banks.  Trying to grasp on to truth I am swept downstream in the murk, trying to keep my head above the water.  Struggling against the current I try to reach solid ground.  In desperation I reach out to a tree that has remained anchored on the bank.   Clinging to the branch I will myself to hold on, to survive. 

When the flood finally recedes, I am left to witness the damage.  Where beauty once resided, ugliness has taken its place.  Things uprooted and unearthed in the flood lay gnarled and withered in its wake.  Things have changed, never to return to their same beauty.  Trees downed in the flood will never be re-rooted.  New things will grow, but the landscape has changed. 

Tears flow freely now, it's natural with loss.  But the challenge before me is how to weather this storm?  Flinging stones and becoming my own flood will only cause more destruction and heartache.  Innocents would also be affected.  For a flood always does more damage than can be anticipated. 

The key isn't found in forging the river and forcing it to return to its normal banks.  It is found in forgiveness.  The one throwing the stones may never seek forgiveness.  But I know that in me deciding to forgive the offense will bring healing to my own heart and allow me to follow the steps of the Savior back to a place of peace and wholeness.

Advent Calendar Day Twelve

December 12

In this box there is a handmade peace sign which represents Jesus, the Prince of Peace.

Isaiah 9:6

"For to us a child is born,
to us a child is given,
and the government will be on his shoulders.
And his will be called
Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God,
Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace."

Jesus doesn't just give peace, He is Peace.  In a world where there is so much uncertainty, where things are shaking and out of our control, why not trust in the One who brings peace and who is Peace?

A Peaceful Christmas

There is something different about Christmas this year...

There is a peace and a rest from the normal hustle and bustle of the normal Christmas season. I think some of it may be attributed to our recent move. Some of the activities I enjoy (and miss this year too) have left my calendar open. The cookie exchanges, Christmas parties, caroling events...the things that have been part of my Christmas in the past, are not a part of my Christmas this year. The white space on my calendar has been refreshing.

It has allowed time to have Advent Christmas readings as a family. It has allowed time to spend in Bible study and reflecting of Who God is and what He has done. It has allowed time to focus on relationships rather than the "Christmas routine".

I'm sure it has helped that I purposed to finish Christmas shopping around Thanksgiving time, that three little "Christmas elves" decided to decorate the house for me while I slept the night after Thanksgiving, and that my heart has been tuned more this year to what is important, rather than what is urgent.

Maybe some of it has been seeing my 20 month old carrying around baby Jesus from our nativity set daily. It has been a great reminder that throughout this season, the most important thing is to carry Jesus with me and to share His light with the world.